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Messages - Dr. Belch

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1
Youtube and Google Videos / Red hairring
« on: September 22, 2008, 03:44:16 PM »
I always thought Princess Peach (or as she was called in my day, Toadstool) from the Mario games looked better with auburn hair. She's been blonde in the games for some 10, twelve years now. If they ever make a new Mario cartoon I would hope they go back to her--if you'll pardon the pun--redhead roots.

Aye, but redheaded lassies have the problem of fair skin that burns easy. My ex couldn't even go out on a bright day without heavy makeup, lots of layers, and a big floppy hat. The California sun is very unforgiving to a wee Irish rose.

2
Questions and Answers / The crying game
« on: September 22, 2008, 03:00:52 PM »
I'll see your two, Hammy, and raise you another: The Stooges would enter their girlfriends' home and find them weeping disconsolately. Curly takes a hanky and daubs each girl's eyes gently, one, two, three. He then squeezes the cloth and produces enough water to fill a convenient glass or vase sitting nearby. I don't know if this gag was used enough to be a bona fide stock routine, or in which short(s) it appeared in, though.

3
Youtube and Google Videos / Dye, dye, my darling
« on: September 17, 2008, 12:22:25 AM »
Was she a redhead who went blonde or a blonde that went red?

 >:D And did she dye the other half?

 [pie]

4
General Discussion / You Palin comparison
« on: September 16, 2008, 02:09:17 AM »
I have a column in my periodic blog about Sarah Palin, particularly the hypocritical and overblown reaction from the "mustache brigade" wing of the feminist movement on her nomination, which bears close reading.

5
General Discussion / Re: BDC (Aug 2008)
« on: September 16, 2008, 01:51:11 AM »
The line about a rash being caused by excessive use of the brain was lifted from "Pardon My Clutch" (1948). The "[Cabo San] Lucas sites" joke was a paraphrase of a gag first used in 1935's "Restless Knights".

For more comic fun, check out the Sep 2008 issue.

6
General Discussion / Belch Dimension Comics (Sep 2008)
« on: September 16, 2008, 01:45:05 AM »


This is more of an homage to slasher movies than to the Stooges...although if the boys had crossed genres into horror (think the Corman pictures of the sixties), this is probably what it'd have looked like. The Scotsman definately steals the scene with his hilariously over-the-top delivery....

|| ||   

7
Read These First (FAQ) / Worst Episode Opinion
« on: September 16, 2008, 01:16:05 AM »
Besser did what he did, and did it well. You can't really fault him for the lackluster scripts he was given, such as his debut short "Hoofs and Goofs". I mean, a horse giving birth in a bed? Eww. Those sheets would be unuseable, and likely the frame and boxspring would have to be replaced as well. Even wierder was the "sequel" of that short a year later, despite the first being a dream sequence...a human-turned-horse falling in love with a male horse? I'm not even sure how to catagorize that abomination.... Also, Joe not wanting to be hit with a "solid" prop, opting for a casserole instead? Odd...I'd have opted for the rolling pin, because that prop casserole (which I always thought was salad) looked terribly messy....

8
General Discussion / Belch Dimension Comics (Aug 2008)
« on: August 01, 2008, 07:36:49 PM »
I've always wanted to create cartoons because I saw early on that they had the power to make people happy ,and that's what I've always wanted to do.  I grew up on Looney Tunes, He-Man, Woody Woodpecker, and, yes, the Stooges. I always wanted to create a series that captured the sort of old-school humor and values I loved as a kid.   

For about three years now I've been writing, drawing and trying to distribute a little indiecom called The Belch Dimension Comics.  Once a month or so I showcase samples of the magazine on message boards such as these.

BDC #40: "A Rash Decision"
1                           2                  3                     4

I referenced a couple of Stooges film in there. See if you can figure out which ones.

As of yet the comic isn't available in print, though you can buy the issues as PDFs through my website.

9
Questions and Answers / Julia Rosenthal
« on: July 31, 2008, 02:39:38 PM »
There's a 4 page article on [Julia] in The Three Stooges Journal, issue #76...The info that we know now, it makes perfect sense to me why the Horwitz family...would say Jerry's marriage would've been annuled.  The Horwitz family was very orthodox, and a divorce within the orthodox community back then (and now, too, probably) was definitely frowned upon.
Weren't Jerry and Julia quite young? I'd heard they were barely out of their teens...and I've got a brother myself who married when he and his gal were just teenagers. She dropped a calf only a few months after the wedding, which made a few of the old-kraut Lutherans in my church look down their noses at us. They were together a few years, then they split, and she took the kid...and he's already on wife two though he's barely 25. So, yeah I can relate. I guess Julia either cared about Curly or her own reputation too much to step forth and demand money (not that Curly was ever really rich; between White Fang Cohn's notorious penny-pinching, his zest for life, and his medical bills he must have struggled to stay afloat).

There's just something about show folk who marry multiple times and die young. It's always about wife four they strike gold, then, bam, they die. Curly Howard, Lewis Grizzard and Redd Foxx must have a lot of fun in Heaven, sitting around playing cards and talking about the dozen women they had between them....   

10
Questions and Answers / Moe better blues
« on: July 27, 2008, 01:06:46 AM »
Of course, one must remember that many of the interviews were conducted and the books  written when the surviving Stooges were well into their sixties, so one must allow for some gaps in the old memory. Plus Shemp and Curly weren't around to drop in their two cents...we still don't know the name of Curly's first wife, even after all these years--fear of family scandal, they say. I wonder if she or her kids (if she ever had any) ever came forth and demanded a cut of the Stooge pie?     

11
General Discussion / Christine McIntyre
« on: July 19, 2008, 02:10:52 AM »
In her later years--which, as you said, by Tinseltown standards was about 40--McIntyre retired from showbiz and went into real estate, where she worked for 30 years. Now that's something.  Wouldn't you love to be the guy who could say, "Hey, my pop bought our house from the dame who beat the hell outta Shemp in 'Brideless Groom'!" 

12
General Discussion / Racism
« on: July 19, 2008, 01:59:09 AM »
There's nothing that enrages me more than some liberal feeblewit who starts puffing and blowing and gets all self-righteous when he sees a blackface gag in a 50-year-old cartoon, yet looks the other way at real and substantive racism, violence and genocide in the world. I am a witer and artist; I deal daily with ignorant people who don't even know the meanings of "racism", "propoganda", of half the words they slobber witlessly at anyone who doesn't "think" like they do. When some leftist fartknocker buttonholes me with his tired tripe about we conservatives all being racist bigot sexist homophobe Nazis, I want to say to him, Oh, shut up. Your pseudomoralistic sniffing bores me. You're bawling over an ink-and-paint depiction of racial violence. Hey, fartknocker, y'ever hear of Darfur? Rwanda? Hezbollah? Do us all a favor: do some research, educate your stupid self, then come talk to me about racism, and I'll listen. Producing an ethnic cartoon or movie isn't racist. By that logic, Bill Hanna and Joseph Barbera were rabid cat haters. That argument doesn't wash; it's as phony as global warming, methol cigarettes, and the TV ratings system...and the world would be better off if these self-appointed protectors of decency would realize that.

13
Questions and Answers / Bird in the head
« on: July 19, 2008, 01:33:50 AM »
  I don't know if you remember the part in HEAVENLY DAZE where a fountain pen gets caught in Larry's forehead.  Apparantly, it really hurt, and he let a few [swears] fly not knowing there was a group of schoolchildren watching on a field trip.
I knew about the pen screwup--seems it missed the mark by an inch or two--but not about Larry cussing. Another story goes that Moe chased the director around the room in a fit because he promised Larry wouldn't get hurt doing that stunt. With that little circus going on, I imagine those schoolkids were either thrilled or traumatized for life.

Oh, "Punch Drunks" has always been a favorite of mine, but now I have a new reason to watch: seems some joker in the audience flipped off the camera.  Speaking of, Moe asks Larry to give someone the "bird" in "Whoops, I'm an Indian", but Larry does this weird duck call thing with his mouth rather than offer up his middle finger. It's still enough to get him smacked, though.

14
Questions and Answers / Stooge in, Stooge out
« on: July 19, 2008, 01:14:44 AM »
The coming of Shemp was handled much better than the advent of Joe Besser, most certainly. Columbia would have been perfectly happy to fart out new films with just Moe and Larry, plus cuts of Shemp interspersed with celluloid showcases of Joe Palma's skill at body-doubling...but Moe wouldn't have it. I suppose his own ego, combined with the ghost of Curly's medical bills and Larry always being strapped for cash, drove him to keep going...maybe he told himself, "Babe and Shemp would've wanted it this way." If Columbia had their way, here's my vision of what we'd have seen in our local theater, c. 1958:

The Three Stooges
"Dipshit Diplomats"
Open with thirty seconds of new footage of rich snobby people at a garden party. One talks to another about recently hiring a trio of paperhangers.

Stock footage of Curly and Larry wallpapering Moe into the wall from "A Bird in the Head" (Curly is replaced with judicious fake Shemping) and Shemp and Larry doing the same from "Jerks of All Trades". Then, stock footage of them bashing Moe headfirst through drywall from "Listen, Judge".

Snooty lady come in and sees the damage, then screams. Cut to the exterior of the house where the boys--played by body doubles seen from a distance--crash the garden party while hightailing it out of there. Inexplicably the rich snobs decide these three would be perfect for a diplomatic mission to Saudi Arabia no one in their right mind would take.

The diplomatic training begins with stock cuts of the dance training scene in "Hoi Polloi", with a fake Shemp replacing all Curly's scenes right up to the point where the instructor gets a fly down her cleavage and leaps out the window, Stooges following after.

Cut to the boys in Saudi Arabia, using all desert-themed stock footage: the taxi crossing the ocean scene from "We Want Our Mummy", the Santa Claus gag from "Wee Wee Monsieur", a few cuts from "Malice in the Palice and "Three Arabian Nuts", a new bridge, 20 to 30 seconds long with some goober--the Saudi dictator who's causing all the trouble (insert some bizarre Middle Eastern monicker here) and threatening the interests of those rich folks back home. He tires of the boys' foolishness and launches a missile at them. Place shot of Stooges riding missile from "Boobs In Arms"  here. In the last scene the snooty rich folks, including their ex-employer, are lounging around the garden laughing at their cleverness...when three stuffed dummies (that missile's got a hell of a range, I'll tell you what, and damn precise too) crash down on them.    END.


There, I just wrote a Stooges script that has not one new scene with the Stooges in it. Should I be proud or horrified with myself?

15
Questions and Answers / Caricatures
« on: July 17, 2008, 05:32:22 PM »
In the modern era, there was the short "Pinky and the Brain...and Larry", in which the world-domination seeking lab mice are partnered with a third mouse who looks and sounds like Larry Fine. Naturally it throws off their dynamic, and the plan soon degenerates to Stoogeish slapstick. Billy West, who does a spot-on Larry Fine, voiced Larry the lab mouse. "I'm the one called Larry."

Another P&B episode showed a number of world leaders watching films by a comedy trio dubbed "The Three Morons" (presumably for copyright purposes) who were, of course, caricatures of  [3stooges].

I myself have a comic book series in which I do a lot of Stooge homages. One story, "Nutzi Nazis", features caricatures Adolf Hitler, Martin Bormann, and SS doctor Ludwig Stumpfegger as Moe, Curly, and Larry respectively.

Which I guess just shows to go ya--always imitated, never duplicated.

16
There's an (unconfirmed) story that Buddy Hackett was being considered for the part, but he turned it down because he didn't want to do hard slapstick— he was afraid of getting injured.

I still never understood the story about the whole "hitting with pipes." As a comedian, I would think that Hackett would've known that foam appliances were used, even if he wasn't that familiar with the Stooges.  Now, if he'd seen them on stage....that may have changed his mind--the fact that the slaps were real would be off-putting to most.

True, but sometimes things went wrong with the props. For example, Moe actually fractured a couple of ribs on a breakway table that separated wrong. And during a pie fight the prop guys would scoop up the shaving cream mixture off the floor for another take, and it'd have dirt and hair and cigarette butts and mouse droppings and God knew what all mixed in there. Imagine taking a kisser full of that. Or worse--one poor actress, it seems, opened her mouth at the wrong time and got some "pie" gook caught in her throat. She needed medical attention there on the set to get it out.

I wonder if they considered any of the other stars they'd worked with over the years as third Stooge? Emil Sitka was too new at that point, and Eddie Laughton only had minor parts in a half dozen fims before his death (1952).   

17
Read These First (FAQ) / Re: Worst Episode Opinion
« on: July 17, 2008, 03:31:43 PM »
Beer Barrel Polecats is quite off. The riotous yeast gag is the high point, but it sort of loses its way in the second half with the Goodbye, Mr. Chumps footage that never quite meshes with the beermaking plot, and Eddie Laughton either couldn't or wouldn't come in to film a new scene at the end. That maybe would have better tied the thing together.

Three Loan Wolves, another short from the ailing Curly era, also leaves a sour taste. Larry makes a game effort, but can't quite pull off jokes that were obviously scripted with a frentic Curly in mind. And the kid just up and walks away from his three "dads", who raised him, to go look for his mom (well, actually, his aunt, if I recall right), who was little more than some two-bit gun moll who abandoned him as a baby.  Ungrateful little turd, wasn't he?

Joe Besser was actually a stand-up guy. He realized his limits and spoke warmly of the team, whic hhe called "Besser and the Stooges". That bioepic they did a while back made him out to be more like a petulent, arrogant horse's ass.


18
General Discussion / Stooge supporting player sighting
« on: July 17, 2008, 03:14:03 PM »
Ah, yes, I've recalled another one. Walter Brennan, the scratchy-voiced character actor who played the fellow lodge member in Woman Haters and The Stooges' pop in Restless Knights, is perhaps best known for starring in the sixties sitcom The Real McCoys.

Dye-blonde doll Christine McIntyre may best be known for her Stooge work, but she was actually a very gifted stage actress and soprano (and, yes, that is actually her voice heard in Micro-Phonies). With better luck and timing she might have even enjoyed a TV career as fruitful as Brennan's or Ball's.

19
Questions and Answers / Soup To Nuts
« on: July 16, 2008, 05:00:45 PM »
This is a fairly obscure film that I've only seen once on AMC. That was maybe eight or 10 years ago, before they started dubbing in commercials and decided the Keanu Reeves/Sandra Bullock vehicle Speed counted as a "classic".   A frentic but largely forgotten little romp, it's perhaps most notable for
  • a script by Rube Goldberg, a man famous for his complex devices (one of which we see here)
  • the Harpo Marx-ish Healy crony Freddy Sandborn, who mugs and gamboles his way through the entire picture
    • the line a markedly younger and more clean-cut Shemp utters about wanting "baloney and whipped cream" (which Moe himself would use about 15 years later in Idiots Deluxe).
    I don't know about radio, but the boys did appear in comic books. It's hard to get an eye poke or a head bop to translate well to ink and paper, but it can be done.
    http://www.stoogeworld.com/_Comic%20Books/HTML/Dell%20History.htm
    http://www.newkadia.com/?Comics=3911

20
Questions and Answers / Curly cuts one?
« on: July 16, 2008, 04:33:25 PM »
Let us not forget that moment in "Dizzy Detectives" where it sounds like Curly passes gas while rounding a corner quickly.  It could be just his shoe squeaking on the floor, but I never heard a shoe make a noise like that....    :P

I wonder if any of the Stooges ever forgot themselves and let loose a few choice words into a hot mike when they actually got hurt doing those stunts? I know I'd do some powerful cussing if I cracked a couple of ribs falling on a breakway table or cut my head open on a loose board....


21
Questions and Answers / In the drink
« on: July 16, 2008, 04:21:21 PM »
The Western shorts were some of my favorites because of the "drink-mixing" gag, which involved pouring often noxious combinations of liquids into an old boot and shaking it. In one Larry pours paint into the boot, and Moe gets onto him for it...so he pours something else from another can in on top of it. Moe asks him what that was. "Paint thinner!" Larry grins.  [slap]

The gag continues when Larry--told the trick drink is for the bad guy and the real one is for Shemp--gets mixed up and slips Shemp the glass with the paint, the paint thinner, and whatever else nasty things got into the mix i nit. Now I'll be damned if I can remember the name of the short--does anyone know? And was this bit ever recycled in a cheapie remake?

22
General Discussion / Re: Stooge supporting player sighting
« on: July 16, 2008, 04:02:26 PM »
Joe Besser lent his voice to an I Dream of Jeannie cartoon in the seventies, playing a fat, incompetent apprentice genie named Baboo.   "Rapple-dapple!"   Jeannie, her master (not Maj. Nelson, but some teenager), and Baboo appeared in The New Scooby Doo Movies, since both series were created by Hanna-Barbera. The Three Stooges appeared in two other SD movie episodes, though not voiced by the original Stooges--Moe and Larry had passed on two years before, and DeRita was nowhere near the project for some reason.

I don't suppose I need to mention a young blonde (!) then-unknown named Lucille Ball got her start in THREE LITTLE PIGSKINS...but I will.  [3stooges]

23
General Discussion / Re: George Carlin dead at 71
« on: July 16, 2008, 03:45:41 PM »
Although in most respects a flaming liberal, he skewered everybody equally--right, left, black, white, gay, straight, Christian, Jew. His acerbic observations on environmentalism and hippie tree-hugger morons were especially spot-on. I listened to "You Are All Diseased" again shortly after his passing, and I couln't help but wince at the bit near the end where he dared God to strike him dead. Well, I guess now he's found out for sure whether God exists or not. As for me, I believe He exists, but I question His nature.

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