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Author Topic: Secret File: SLIPP  (Read 1316 times)

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Offline shemps#1

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Secret File: SLIPP
« on: February 10, 2012, 11:44:32 AM »
Another long lost gem from January 2002, sickdrjoe shares parts of an email exchange he had with metaldams regarding "you know who"... Includes a rare Meditran appearance.

sickdrjoe   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:18��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageY'know what? The HELL with posting Slipp's old idiocies; it ain't like anybody needs PROOF by this point. But seeing Metal 'out' Li'l Eric's private email the other day sort of gave me a great 'forum highlights' idea.

What follows are excerpts from the private email I've swapped with Metaldams, circa May through July...when I was first confronted with The Artist Formerly Known As The Fake ISLIPP, and was understandably dismayed that such people walked the Earth. Now before anybody cries "foul", I have quoted only MY portion of these conversations and have excerpted only MY comments regarding Slipp w/o revealing any personal information regarding Metal, myself or our conversations. I have done this for two reasons:

1) Tell the rest of ya johnny-come-latelies I TOLD YA SO!
2) Brand new, previously unpublished Slipp insults to read!! Not so much a bootleg as studio outtakes and alternate takes (for you record collectors!)

Here goes!

MAY 3 (I'm starting to find him annoying )
"I guess this is as good a time as any to point out that I could probably use a breather from ISLIPP, too. I've about had my fill of his psalm-singing spineless candy ass! Like Supt Chalmers said to Ned Flanders: "Take it outside, God-boy!" When I first came aboard the forum, I knew a lot of the regs were young, college-kid-types, but I assumed (from the tone of the various posts) that YOU were close to 30 and HE hadda be 17 or 18, as your posts were more adult-reading and intelligent and his were so whiny and starved for attention. Finding out that you're 22 or so and HE'S the one close to 30 just gives me a crawly feeling sometimes...half the time I wanna tell him to turn off the f**king computer, take off his jammies, walk out of his mommy's house and get himself laid, or high, or arrested or some f**king thing.

I mean, I surfed over to Stoogeworld and by the time I finally got to the msg board (I ain't got the lay o' the land there quite yet) there he is! ISLIPP clogging the board with his puppy-without-a-home 'let's all be best buddies in God's love' horsesh*t and to be cruel but perfectly frank, I need a little break from this guy. (Yeah, I know he's probably not a bad sort and I'm venting steam, but....sometimes he's like a cross between Felix Unger and Ned Flanders and I can't put up with that round the clock. The other night I ended up posting at like 3:30 AM just so I could swap a little intelligent conversation with Bruckman when, boom! Here he comes at 4 in the goddam morning wanting to catch up on anything he might've missed! And it looks like he cruises EVERY Stooge site known to man, to, constantly. Hey, I've ALREADY got a girlfriend AND a dog – no thanks, Slipp!)
Sorry to blast YOU with this, but I know it wouldn't be cool to say any of this on the board, and I don't wanna crush the guy's feelings or anything...hey, I figger, YOU I can bitch to!"

Lookit how polite I was then...glad I got over THAT.

MAY 5 (it continues... )
"Y'know, I sit here shaking my head - half laughing and half worried about that boy.
It amazes me that he claims he wants to be a writer, and that he'll "never give up"!
(Not as long as my mom doesn't sell the house, at least.) He's like a giant child, has little concept of everyday reality, almost NO knowledge of anything that happened anywhere on Earth before The A Team, a smug, irritating, holier-than-thou-and-better-too attitude that makes total strangers wanna hit him with a rolled up hat like he was f**king Satch from The Bowery Boys, and, most likely, his cherry.
WHAT would he write about? How he loves the taste of Lucky Charms in the morning? He keeps saying he wants to be the next R.L. Stine (whose name he keeps misspelling, too- some 'hero') who is a guy who writes children's books. CHILDREN'S BOOKS, for Christ's sake. What more do ya need to know? Here's my new 'take' on Slipp, since the 'no-tit-touching' seemed to pan out: I picture him in his room, chilling out on the computer, wearing a gigantic pair of adult Pampers. There's a half-finished coloring book on the bed, to boot. (Seriously now, and I know this is all in fun and Slipp's the salt of the earth,'s very strange. He shows the classic personality-type of the child molester, don't you think? I mean I can't see him with an adult female - he's so damn child like - but by the same token, he's 27 and his hormones are CHURNIN' and he's gotta have SOME outlet. Hey, forget I said it, it's just some morbid notion and besides, we're just talking here........Operator, get me the FBI...)"

MAY 21 (SLIPP has told a bedwetting tale )
Far be it from me to say, "I told ya so"......but Slipp's little tale of making sissy in bed is too, too much. If you've been keeping score, by the way, that's yet ANOTHER common thread among sex preeverts/serial killers. If he ever lets it Slipp that his mom really wanted a daughter and dressed him up like Jon Benet Ramsey till he was 12, call the Millenium Group and leave a message for Frank Black....SO many ways that 'bedwetting' post disturbs me, I can't believe I passed up the many obvious ISLIPP 'signature' cracks (i.e., ISLIPP - on a yellow puddle?; ISLIPP -
on the forensic evidence!; ISLIPP - plus I hear voices!, etc). Just think of what a celebrity you'll be to your friends n family AFTER the cops connect Slipp to the local rash of disappearances!

JUNE 1 (from here on out, Slipp's off to the races )
Y'know, I was on the board briefly and I'll tell you what, Slipp is annoying me ALREADY. Such stupid, stupid threads he starts, and such idiotic posts to other people's - I'm embarrassed being on the same board with him sometimes. Today I see him wearing the giant-baby ensemble: adult Huggies held in place with a GIGANTIC f**king safety-pin, and Mickey Mouse ears. A 3-liter container of Sunkist orange soda sits next to the monitor, beside the beachwear catalogs for pre-teens (the ones with the pix of saucy 10-year-olds with that come-hither look he likes). By now, I'll NEVER be able to picture Slipp in real pants - he's either dressed like Stinky or like Baby Huey. It's outta my hands.

Did you get a load of Slipp PLEADING with me to come back ('Stooges-Dot-Net' thread)??? He needs a friend SO bad, it's painful to think about. Go read that last post by him and ask yourself if you've ever seen such a disgraceful admission of "I have nothing REMOTELY RESEMBLING a life'. He's like a 160-lb worm that taught itself to type.

Not only did I read that moronic comment by Mr Pampers, but it got me so angry that I took a shot at Slipp as Gritto (I'm surprised nobody 'outed' me for that crack alone!) I'm starting to notice that, along with that comment, Slipp kind of thinks of himself as the King Of All Stooge Fans. Notice anytime a poster returns to the board
(like Larrysgirl or Anne), Slipp's right there like the f**kin' doorman & maitre'd. Like he's the official yardstick all Stooge fans are measured by. Metal, it's THAT kind of attitude from him that really twists my onions. Maybe, after I 'announce' my return, I can resume ripping him a third corn-chute. He's the kind of guy that needs to catch a beating every day whether he deserves it or not, anyway, so I'd consider it a public service.

6/28 (on Slipp's ever-whimpering tone )
Indeed. I call it the 'annoying murmur'. The fight is over, they turn away pretending to be satisfied...and out comes the murmur, JUST audible enough to piss you off all over again. Guess what? It's okay in a woman (sort of), and TOTALLY INTOLERABLE in a man.
BTW, I'd be amazed if I receive another e-mail from ISH*TT...but you never know. That last one I sent him pretty much sank his battleship, don't ya think?

Slipp Explained (Sort Of)
Well, like most people fond of using big words, I'm pretty hopeless on math issues, but to save time, I just refer to this simple rule:
Lemme tell you, this rule never lets me down: it works EVERY time, like Colt 45!
(BTW, his favorite A-Teamer is MURDOCK. That pretty much sez it all.)

It's Official, He's A F**king Idiot!

Okay, Metal, I just sat down and CLOSELY SCRUTINIZED Slipp's idea.
He IS a f**king idiot, hands down.
Do yourself a favor and PAY NO ATTENTION to this dribbling f**king MORON.
He really is amazing: he can't spell. He can't conjugate. Can't think critically. Can't do math. Totally ignorant of history, culture, philosophy, current events, laws of physics, ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. The one and ONLY thing he knows anything about (through single-minded repetition) are Three Stooges shorts. I won't even go near his moronic and bigoted intolerance of others, or his 'groovy' musical tastes. ('Queen ROXX' ??? Pardon me -"ROXX"????) Has NEVER had sex, a friend OR a job.
I stopped my fight with him FAR too soon. Believe it or not, when I'm confronted by such a PERFECT specimen of 'Homo nippleheadus' I feel an irresistible urge to club him to death before he can pollute the Caucasian gene-pool any further. But then you'd have to MATE to spawn, so I guess we're safe. But tell the truth... the more you'd confronted with his smug assholier-than-thou idiocy (who else would start out with made-it-up-myself-math and then spend 2 pages of forum-script INSISTING that YOU'RE wrong???)....aren't you CURIOUS about what this guy is REALLY like? The look on his parents faces when they face him each day? You KNOW his father wishes every day he'da just jerked off into the toilet that night! I picture ten year olds flicking lit cigarettes at him as he leaves his house in the morning...IF he does at all. And the Salvation Army truck making DELIVERIES to his house (Huggies, Big Little Books and Baby Huey bonnets.)
He's the '62 Mets of human beings!!!!!!

Good ol Ned Flanders....he NEVER lets ya down, huh? Arguing with Slipp is like trying to play charades with a German Shepherd. He's never gonna get it.
A word of advice, though...that URGE you feel is gonna get stronger. If you hold your fire but attempt to land the mildest, wittiest of zingers just to gently chide him, he's gonna assume the worst (remember, people are 'always picking fights' with him - his own words), and over-retaliate in that f**gy way that allows him to fire away and YET still play The Misunderstood Innocent, and then, well, then you just GOTTA unload. This isn't a macho pride thing I'm describing, a la Gimmi's almost an involuntary reaction. Because you've been deliberately holding back and restraining yourself and there he is, sh*tting on you like he just caught you assf**king his mother in Macy's window (a theme I would revisit later ), and before you know it, yer going BLOOEY on him in public. So either laugh off his idiocy or bang his hole right out the box! No middle ground, it don't pay with him.

And on and on and on....I'm being merciful cutting it off on the Fourth of July!!
After that, I sorta started to dislike the guy! (Actually, God help me, by October or so I'd actually gotten used to him.)

But Slipp baby, consider this a warning,....I've got ANOTHER 6 MONTHS WORTH of this stuff before I even get to your POSTED nonsense! Leave, Slipp, leave, and save yourself a HELLACIOUS ass-whuppin'...

Edited by - sickdrjoe on 1/8/2002 8:07:54 AM

Edited by - sickdrjoe on 1/8/2002 8:11:44 AM
shemps#1   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:32��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageThe humble beginnings of the Hatfields and Dahmers.

A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words.
curly_cue12   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:36��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageOk, i warned you.
If this is a fake ISLIPP, Then i wont bother you.
However,if this is the Slipp, Then i will have to e-mail you.
Do you know how childish this is?
It is a huge waste of time,And your slaver ruins this forum.
curly_cue12   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:40��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageI agree with you on many things,SickDrJoe.
But do you have anything better to do?
If this guy is an a$$,e-mail him,And keep it out of the forum.I am the most powerful enemy you have,SickDrJoe, Because you have no material on me.
Do you have to bring this worthless, Slavering sand-box argument into the forum?
Please,stop the childish now.
"Only you can prevent forum fires."
sickdrjoe   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:42��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageAs usual I have NO idea what you're trying to say, Cue. You need to have some big person with a credit card order you SEE IT & SAY IT IN ENGLISH, ok?
ShempShady   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:43��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessagePriceless stuff, doc!
curly_cue12   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:43��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageAnd one more thing.
If you so much as breath wrong in this forum,
I swear with God as my witness,Your A$$ will go down hard.
I am more powerful now that i have several things off of my back.
consider THIS a warning,and fill your hands with lead, you son of a B****
shemps#1   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:47��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageI didn't give you permission to speak, fish!

A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words.
curly_cue12   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:47��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageI tried...............
You only prove my point that you are a slavering fool.
You cannot read simple English........
Do i have to spell it out?
in other words,if you dont quit filling the forum with this slaver, your butt is down.
ShempShady   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:52��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageLet me guess, cue: Was the January 7th entry on your 2002 'Word-a-Day' calendar...'slaver,' perhaps?
shemps#1   Posted - 7 January 2002 22:55��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageWhat the hell is this fascination with drool of yours? What an idiot!

A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words.
curly_cue12   Posted - 7 January 2002 23:1��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit Message"i did not give you permission to speak fish!"
Most fish do not suffer from disease,
But you, My brainless friend, Suffer from a disease of the mind.
Slaver does not mean drool.
It means "mindless words." according to webster[that is not the exact definition.].
now that i have thrown the feathers away......
"someone who slavers......any moron replying to this ...slaver!]
ShempShady   Posted - 7 January 2002 23:5��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit Message'Slaver' means 'driveling saliva'—and by extension 'drivel; idiocy.'
sickdrjoe   Posted - 7 January 2002 23:7��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageCue, have you ever done The Impossible Sit-Up?

Based on the impacted fecal matter in your eyebrows, I'd guess 'no, but you keep TRYING'.
shemps#1   Posted - 7 January 2002 23:8��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageMain Entry: [2]slaver
Function: noun
Date: 14th century
: saliva dribbling from the mouth

If you do not know what a word means, do not use it. Soon enough they'll call you Chef Cue; with a specialty in "salad-tossing".

A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words.
metaldams   Posted - 7 January 2002 23:9��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageSick, I wish I followed your 7/4 advice earlier.

Ah yes, the classic "jerk off in the toilet" line. I almost s*&t myself when I first read that. This stuff brings back fond memories. Good job sick.

NoseHonk   Posted - 7 January 2002 23:14��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageWell done sick and metal. cc12, I've noticed the more YOU post here, the less FMCQ posts here, there wouldn't happen to be a correllation would there?
metaldams   Posted - 8 January 2002 0:29��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageBump
ShempShady   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:1��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageScrutiny!
sickdrjoe   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:2��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageBump - and huff my anal vapor, Meditran!
sickdrjoe   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:8��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageBump & ISLIPP's a %#*&@ idiot!
sickdrjoe   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:16��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit Messagebump
ShempShady   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:36��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit Message(Worth another bump.)

NoseHonk   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:51��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageZING!
bruckman   Posted - 8 January 2002 1:58��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageThis gives me a little info on what went on during May and June when I was off the forum and came back to find SDJ and Slipp at it. The more I find out about this the more I realize the advice I gave Slipp was not only a waste of my time, it was a waste of everyone's time. A cold dull feeling of horror settles in. You know, I honestly hope Slipp is a writer and puts all this between covers; it would outdo anything by Borges or Umberto Eco.
sweet_canadian_girl   Posted - 8 January 2002 11:5��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageJust for the hell of it.....

Bump! By the way, this is some f***ed up s*it!

"Its is aBooT PRIDE!!! It is ABOOOT zee molecular structure of SPAM!!!!"
sickdrjoe   Posted - 8 January 2002 13:47��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageHEY Meditran! you wanna be 'accepted' here and prove you "eight" aren't Slipp? Fine.

#1. Come up with some NASTY sexual slurs involving Slipp's mom, involving how little it costs to purchase her services

#2. Describe fat tub of guts phony minister John Haggee in the most excoriating terms. Picture him in outlandishly-excessive homosexual couplings & situations.

No half-stepping, either. And NO baloney about how "six of us are ready to do it, but Dave's gay and Edie's a devout Babtist" EITHER. Fulfill these simple requests and you MIGHT just get a membership card (I mean, 8 cards!)

Edited by - sickdrjoe on 1/8/2002 1:48:47 PM
Squid McGuffey   Posted - 8 January 2002 13:52��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageI think I saw SLIPP's parents on Jerry Springer. His mother can't have sex unless it is in a tub of dead fish and his father can only have sex with ice sculptures, preferably of swans.

There - I've joined the childish behavior I have been damning all day

'I got the gas bill!!!'
sickdrjoe   Posted - 8 January 2002 14:8��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit Message...and don't you feel BETTER now? Admit it!
Meditran   Posted - 8 January 2002 14:53��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit MessageFor Drjoe:

1. Yes, ISLIPP's mom's service charges are so low, but the service is so great! Bill Clinton was with her one night and guess what SHE tried to do with the cigar?

2. John Haggee? Calling him a fat tub of guts is as true as calling Clinton horny. He MUST be homosexual though, if ISLIPP is a follower of his. His phoniness knows no bounds. The people who listen to him are either nuts or sick of Saturday Night Live.

What do you think? I may not be much of a commedian, but I be can as good a slam artist as anybody.
shemps#1   Posted - 8 January 2002 14:56��Show Profile��Email Poster��Edit Message....and you're still unfunny!

A conspiracy of silence speaks louder than words.
"Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day; teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime; give a man religion and he will die praying for a fish." - Unknown